Confessions

by Elana

i don't want to lose a moment
i don't want to miss a kiss
sadly i think and end my days like this
my day was never complete unless i heard you say..
"good morning.. good morning, love.
i've waited all night long to sing you this song.
daddy's baby, good morning."
but one day you sopped
i waited for those calls almost everyday

i thought of it today, so i sat there and let it play
the tears running down my face
i was a mess
i tried to stop
because you don't deserve a thing
i wish i could tell you things, but you always seem to busy.

maybe i should just chill out because now i'm feeling dizzy
from crying over everything you've ever put me through
i gathered all the pieces
and glued them one by one
once i saw the final picture i was quite stunned
none of this was my fault
it was you who put me here
in all these hard predicaments and challenges; oh well
i guess i ask too much of you to call me here and there
i only want to hear your voice; is that such a waste of time?
for three minutes in the morning, one day it might save my life
because right now i feel helpless
and i don't know what to do
all because you did something you promised you'd never do

mom's always saying you're a piece of shit
but what am i to say ?
i mean, i am your kid
do i defend you or is it true ?
in all honesty i have no clue
i wish i did tho
maybe then id have some closure
i wouldn't cry as much
over what i think is nothing
but in reality its you
you hurt me
but i wont let you know
no one needs to know how you make me feel sometimes 
i wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy
now my words are blurry from the tiny little tears
so surprised i could take it this long; its gone on for years.