Just to Feel Alive

by Courtney

I'm so afraid i love you,
I can't be alone with you,
But i have to be with you,
Just to feel alive.

I lay here out of faith,
Confused about what is real,
I feel you breathing for me.
I have everything for you,
I'm so afraid I love you.

The dark holds so many surprises for me,
You hold me under.
Why Me ?

Now let go of me, love,
I wish you all the worst for the future,
I'm so afraid i love you.

I hope you laugh at all the times i cried for you,
I hope you still see me face to facade.

I'm so afraid I love you,
I can't be alone with you,
But I need to be with you,
Just to feel alive.

And even now,
I don't know why.
But i would love to see you cry,
For me.

But i feel you breathe for me,
And i cannot waste my tears.
Not for you.

But my revelations come quick and fast,
And i have never really felt anything.

Just know,
That i've looked down on you
Trying to love you.
But I couldn't feel anything.
So just smile back.

I'm so afraid I love you,
I can't be alone with you,
But I need to be with you,
Just to feel alive.